Disappointment to the next level.
Saturday, Nov. 24, 2012 6:53 PM

In case you all wanted to know, I sexted Jake last night and I'm utterly disappointed and disgusted with myself.
I really don't even know what came over me.
Plus we made plans to hook up once more.
Did these last two years of nothing but stress and tears teach me nothing?
Apparently.
Clap if you're beyond proud that I keep making the same godforsaken mistakes over and over and over and over and over again.
Because you really fucking should be, I'll tell you that.
I don't even know what I plan on doing with all of this.
WHY THE FUCK DID HE HAVE TO MOVE BACK?!?!
why couldn't he have just stayed where it was geographically impossible for us to hook up?! That would have made my life beyond easier and I wouldn't completely despise myself right now.
I haven't cried, which I suppose is always top notch, but I'm really disappointed in myself.
What's more is that I'm still going to go through with it.
Maybe it's the fact that I haven't had sex in like 2 1/2 years and my own fingers will only take me so far?